Friday, November 25th, 2005

Time	Event
9:34a	So frustrating! Today is my day off. The first year of teaching has been quite stressful and all-consuming so far, so I decided that yesterday and today would be my days off. Yesterday I went to see my relatives in Virginia for Thanksgiving, and now today my plans are to do nothing (that I don't want to do) and not feel guilty for not being productive. But I might as well go do homework, because all of my plans are being foiled! My first plan: Watch the World Gymnastics Championships. I was quite excited that an online site, www.wcsn.com, is offering coverage of the Gymnastics Champs on streaming video for $9.95. And it is airing on my day off! Perfect! So I bought it. I went to log in last night, but every link I clicked on told me to click to "Buy." I already bought the damn thing! I even typed in all of my info again, because my confirmation e-mail told me that I might have to enter my address and credit card info again for verification purposes. So it processed everything again, charged me again (I'm assuming), and did not let me log in to watch the program! I e-mailed- no reply. I called them- they're closed. So then I proceeded to play with my server for a good hour, logging into the site on every browser that I own, till the site informed me that I had logged in too many times and was being kicked out. Grrr! Okay, I thought, I can't watch the World Championships. I'll just go to International Gymnast online and read about it. But when I click on the link, the site can't be found. Alright, I think, I'll just watch my tape of the 2004 Olympics, since I'm in a gymnastics-watching mood. Nope, can't find the tape. Alright, I'll watch mindless television instead. So I check the TV Guide- nothing I want to watch at 9AM on a Friday morning, even when I have given myself permission to waste time. So I look at my roommate's DVD collection. I decide to watch When Harry Met Sally, since I am one of the only people in the USA who has never seen it. I open the case- no disc inside. I look everywhere- no disc. Perhaps this is all a sign that I should just go clean my room, since it really needs it, and forget about a day "off"! Current Mood: frustrated Current Music: Riverdance (Comment on this)
9:47a	You try teaching Middle School, Mr. President! Last week I reached a very frustrated point in my first year of teaching. I'm actually feeling a lot better now, but I had some interesting thoughts at my most frustrated points. Our school took our Math Unit Exams last week. I never minded tests as a student (I still don't), but I HATE them at a teacher! Many of my students need a lot of review of basic concepts, but I have to give them the grade-level exams, on a pre-determined and set-in-stone testing schedule, and they are not doing well on them. In fact, the test results are quite dismal. As I was wallowing in frustration a week ago, I thought: According to the current political environment, the fact that none of my students passed this test is all my fault. Despite the fact that I often stay at school till 9PM and I come into school about every other Sunday, our students our failing because our school is failing them. I don't necessarily agree with the other extreme of the argument that says that nothing teachers do matter because certain students will fail no matter what, and I also know that I have a lot to learn and improve upon as a teacher, but I am also quite frustrated with the current political rhetoric about teachers. I must admit that, before I started teaching, I too thought that being intelligent, hard-working, having good intentions, and liking children (and even pre-teens) would make me a good teacher. But being a good teacher, especially Middle School, is so much more complicated! Hopefully with experience, I'll gain those undefined traits (and the very defined trait of better organization skills!) that will make me a better teacher. It's not that I don't enjoy teaching, or that I'm not making any progress with my students, but I find the expectation that my students can come in terribly behind, with learning disabilities, and perform at the level of their grade-level peers to be very difficult to deliver. And I also think that it's almost impossible to realize just how difficult teaching can be until you've tried it yourself. Current Mood: thoughtful Current Music: Still Riverdance (Comment on this)
6:06p	My Productive Unproductive Day My unproductive day actually turned out fine. I did clean my room, which wasn't so bad because I am the only roommate home today (the rest traveled for the holiday) so I got to play my Les Miserables soundtrack and sing along to every song while I was doing it. I hadn't planned to do "work" today, but having a clean room is very psychologically uplifting. It makes me feel like my life is in order. And I no longer trip over things while I walk through my room. Then I did laundry and washed my sheets. Then, I tried to log into the World Championship Sports Network again, and this time it worked! Yay! There were a few glitches, but I was able to watch half of the competition- and the webcast shows many more routines than the networks ever do. Now, I'm off to synagogue and then Irish dancing. The nice thing about official days of Unproductivity is that I congratulate myself for getting a few things done, instead of feeling frustrated with myself for not finishing everything on my list (which happens almost every day this year!). Current Mood: content (1 Comment | Comment on this)

<< Previous Day

2005/11/25 [Calendar]

Next Day >>